What's a nine to five office job?

That sounds exactly like what I want

Young man, that is one party

you may not be able to handle

Nine to five, nine to five

Monday to Friday live

Nine to five, nine to five

Cubicles and neon lights

Nine to five, nine to five

Stay till six, get overtime

Nine to five, nine to five

We motherfucking love our lives

Wake up in the morning at six

Breakfast with the wife and kids

Pack yourself a lunch, a ham sandwich

A juice box and carrot sticks

Cafeteria food is expensive

It may not fit into your budget

Hop on the bus, public transit

Or carpool for the environment

Leave early in case there is traffic

Bring a news paper or your favourite music

John Mayer, Tim McGraw and Styx

And Jon Bon Jovi's greatest hits

Get to work at eight fifty five

Five minutes early, so you have the time

To pour yourself a coffee and say 'Hi'

To your coworkers, "Good morning, guys!"

Talk about the shows that were on last night

Or a sports event, if you're a guy

The boss walks in and says

"Look at the time, everybody get to work, it is nine"

Nine to five, nine to five

Bathroom break at 11:05

Nine to five, nine to five

Quality chairs that support the spine

Nine to five, nine to five

External calls, make sure to press nine

Nine to five, nine to five

We motherfucking love our lives

Photo copiers, fax machines

And casual Fridays, you get to wear jeans (Yay!)

How crazy is that, wearing jeans to work

On the tenth of every month wear Hawaiian shirts

Hawaiian shirt day, Hawaiian shirt day

Who said an office job wasn't a part-e

Health insurance, paid sick days

Bring baked goods to work on Tuesdays

Jill's muffins are always a hit

"What's the recipe Jill?" "They're from Costco..."

"Still, good choice." "Yeah, good choice, they're nice and squishy."

Staplers, keyboards, calculations

Work-related conversations

"Hey, did you get my work-related email?"

"Yes, I got your work-related email."

"Your Tron screensaver's really rad."

"Thanks, I like your Star Wars mouse pad."

"It was a gift from my dentist on my 30th birthday."

Clock strikes five, it's the end of the work day

Home by six, in bed by ten

Wake up and do it all over again

Nine to five, nine to five

Why do I always feel like crying?

Nine to five, nine to five

This is not what I dreamt of as a child

Nine to five, nine to five

Everyday someone commits suicide

Nine to five, nine to five

We motherfucking hate our lives