Now I stutter, now I dribble

Other than that, I'm lots like I was then

The decline and fall of me

I just shaved my nose off, oh well

Other than that, I'm lots like I was then

The decline and fall of me

If I had a hammer I would drop it and break it

Look at the pieces

Now I've got a hobby, I collect frozen pizzas

Check out my pizzas

Now your jokes seem really funny

Other than that, I'm lots like I was then

The decline and fall of me

Where's my mouth, man, this eating is rough on the shirts

Gee, I'm sorry about the thermometer, nurse

Would you tell me again, which are girls, which are guys

Gee, I thought that this finger meant so long, goodbye

Chart position, bubbling under, drowning

And goodbye future Mrs. Mael (Mael)

The decline and fall, decline and fall, decline and fall of me

I'm fading away

I'm fading away

I'm fading away