Have you ever seen and idealist with grey hairs on his head

Or successful men that keep in touch with unsuccessful friends

You only think you did

I could have sworn I saw it too

But as it turns out

It was just a clever ad for cigarettes

'Cause if it isn't making dollars

Then it isn't making sense

If you aren't moving units

Then you're not worth the expense

If you really want to make it

You had best remember this

If it isn't penetration

The it isn't worth the kiss

We're so sorry sir

But you did not quite make the cut this time

And we'd appreciate it if you cleared you stuff on out by five

Don't take it personal

Everyone knows you did your best

If it makes it easier

You should look at it from our perspective

'Cause if it isn't making dollars

Then it isn't making sense

If you aren't moving units

Then you're not worth the expense

If you really want to make it

You had best remember this

If it isn't penetration

Then it isn't worth the kiss